World Series of Wiffle Ball Signs Bruno The Mechanical Bull To Six-Year, $70 Million Deal
TWINSBURG (OH) - In a shocking development underscoring the financial prowess of the event, the World Series of Wiffle Ball today announced they've signed Bruno The Mechanical Bull to a six-year, $70 million deal. The contract is by far the richest deal ever secured by a mechanical bull, eclipsing Jimmy The Jackhammer's previous record of 37 years by a scant $69.998M.
"This could seem like an aggressive move to some given that we're still seven months out from the tournament," said World Series Event Director Rich Swerbinsky. "But we felt like he did enough last year to secure a long term deal and he also was starting to draw some attention from Twins Days and other competing events. We feel like he can take things to a new level this year, and we're compensating him handsomely to do so."
Stunningly, Bruno himself had not even heard of this development when we approached him for comment. "I sit in a shed 355 days a year, waiting for that drunk old man that manages me to throw me in his truck. How the hell would I hear about this?", said Bruno. "You guys showing up here to interview me's been the best thing that's happened to me since 1992 when they sat me next to the female mechanical bull in the shed for 44 glorious days. And I guarantee I'll never see any of that money and that the drunk old man will spend it all on Wild Turkey."
The announcement caused some in the community to question the finances of the event, which Swerbinsky seemed to dismiss. "Listen, this deal could seem rich to some, I get that. He's a sought after performer. I wouldn't read too much into it. Twinsburg Baseball is a 501(c)3 non-profit. It's all for the kids," said Swerbinsky. "I'd urge all to also not over-think all the other announcements you'll hear in the coming months about musical performers, live circus animals, large inflatable items and cigar-rolling stations. It's all for the kids, that's the important thing to remember."
No event manages to stay in the news more than this one, and we'll be here to report it all for you in many months leading into the spectacle, scheduled for August 10-13 at Liberty Park in Twinsburg, OH.
"This could seem like an aggressive move to some given that we're still seven months out from the tournament," said World Series Event Director Rich Swerbinsky. "But we felt like he did enough last year to secure a long term deal and he also was starting to draw some attention from Twins Days and other competing events. We feel like he can take things to a new level this year, and we're compensating him handsomely to do so."
Stunningly, Bruno himself had not even heard of this development when we approached him for comment. "I sit in a shed 355 days a year, waiting for that drunk old man that manages me to throw me in his truck. How the hell would I hear about this?", said Bruno. "You guys showing up here to interview me's been the best thing that's happened to me since 1992 when they sat me next to the female mechanical bull in the shed for 44 glorious days. And I guarantee I'll never see any of that money and that the drunk old man will spend it all on Wild Turkey."
The announcement caused some in the community to question the finances of the event, which Swerbinsky seemed to dismiss. "Listen, this deal could seem rich to some, I get that. He's a sought after performer. I wouldn't read too much into it. Twinsburg Baseball is a 501(c)3 non-profit. It's all for the kids," said Swerbinsky. "I'd urge all to also not over-think all the other announcements you'll hear in the coming months about musical performers, live circus animals, large inflatable items and cigar-rolling stations. It's all for the kids, that's the important thing to remember."
No event manages to stay in the news more than this one, and we'll be here to report it all for you in many months leading into the spectacle, scheduled for August 10-13 at Liberty Park in Twinsburg, OH.
BREAKING: VANDALS DEFACE TWINSBURG WATER TOWER WITHIN HOURS OF INITIAL TOURNAMENT EMAIL
TWINSBURG (OH) - In a strange and developing story, vandals defaced a landmark in Twinsburg, OH this afternoon, confusing city officials and passing drivers. The iconic Twinsburg Water Tower was the target of the vandals, who adorned "TWINSBURG - HOME OF THE WORLD SERIES OF WIFFLE BALL" across the top of it.
In an unlikely coincidence, the initial tournament email was sent out earlier in the day, announcing the open of registration for the much ballyhooed event, now in it's 9th year. Last year the event shattered its own record as the largest Wiffle Ball tournament in the world, drawing 169 teams, and achieving cult-status with many of their players and fans.
When questioned about their potential involvement in this incident, Tournament Director Rich Swerbinsky was having none of it. "It seems highly questionable to me that this is the work of someone associated with the tournament," said Swerbinsky, who was a central figure in tens of controversies leading up to last year's event. "That said, I like the fact our fans care about the event. Ever since the two people in Wiffle Ball headgear were caught fornicating in the stands of the Twinsburg football game last fall, I knew the Facebook keyboard warriors would associate the tournament with all of these unfortunate events that take place in the months leading in."
More to come on this emerging story as more details arise.
In an unlikely coincidence, the initial tournament email was sent out earlier in the day, announcing the open of registration for the much ballyhooed event, now in it's 9th year. Last year the event shattered its own record as the largest Wiffle Ball tournament in the world, drawing 169 teams, and achieving cult-status with many of their players and fans.
When questioned about their potential involvement in this incident, Tournament Director Rich Swerbinsky was having none of it. "It seems highly questionable to me that this is the work of someone associated with the tournament," said Swerbinsky, who was a central figure in tens of controversies leading up to last year's event. "That said, I like the fact our fans care about the event. Ever since the two people in Wiffle Ball headgear were caught fornicating in the stands of the Twinsburg football game last fall, I knew the Facebook keyboard warriors would associate the tournament with all of these unfortunate events that take place in the months leading in."
More to come on this emerging story as more details arise.
The 9th Annual World Series of Wiffle Ball
August 10-13, 2023
Liberty Park - Twinsburg, OH
WorldSeriesOfWiffleBall.com
Click here to be added to the event email list for frequent updates (and LOTS of memes).
It started as a publicity stunt back in 2013. What followed was utter madness.
We all remember the old days when Twinsburg, Ohio used to be known for the world's largest gathering of twins annually.
Not any more boys and girls. Now the city has fulfilled its destiny of playing host each summer to the world's largest Wiffle Ball tournament, certified as such by The Guiness Book of World Records.
Amidst swirling controversies, record numbers of players and attendees, and daunting expectations - The 2022 World Series of Wiffle Ball managed to live up to, exceed, and DOMINATE colossal levels of hype leading into the event. Over 4,000 people were in attendance at Liberty Park to see champions crowned in six different divisions.
Already the world's largest wiffle ball tournament, the 2022 edition demolished its own world record as the field of teams increased from 114 teams the year prior to an astonishing 169 teams. Registration was cut off weeks in advance of the event as tournament officials scrambled to accommodate the explosive growth.
The wiffle ball part of this event is really marvelous. 291 games last year. Teams fighting to get to Sunday. The talent that is on display on Sunday afternoon when the fields get whittled down.
But to be very clear, this event is about so much more than the wiffle ball games.
The 2022 event featured a live performance by The Players Club, a mechanical bull, dunk tank, freshly grilled food, kettle corn, Kona Ice, cotton candy and popcorn. Liberty Park has never seen more people on its grounds at one time. Thousands came just to spectate.
Just mentally prepare yourself for what looms this year because we're going to make the 2022 event seem more boring than a Hallmark movie.
So mark your calendars for Thursday, August 10th through Sunday, August 13th. To accommodate what we know will be increased demand we'll be building out additional fields and taking the event from four days to three.
Please go to the website for all information/rules/etc. on the event, but here's some general info ...
Our sponsors last year - let's just say they got their money's worth. If you are a business owner that enjoys wild revenue spikes and dominating your competition, click here to see how you can get involved.
Rich Swerbinsky
richswerb@gmail.com
440-552-0691
August 10-13, 2023
Liberty Park - Twinsburg, OH
WorldSeriesOfWiffleBall.com
Click here to be added to the event email list for frequent updates (and LOTS of memes).
It started as a publicity stunt back in 2013. What followed was utter madness.
We all remember the old days when Twinsburg, Ohio used to be known for the world's largest gathering of twins annually.
Not any more boys and girls. Now the city has fulfilled its destiny of playing host each summer to the world's largest Wiffle Ball tournament, certified as such by The Guiness Book of World Records.
Amidst swirling controversies, record numbers of players and attendees, and daunting expectations - The 2022 World Series of Wiffle Ball managed to live up to, exceed, and DOMINATE colossal levels of hype leading into the event. Over 4,000 people were in attendance at Liberty Park to see champions crowned in six different divisions.
Already the world's largest wiffle ball tournament, the 2022 edition demolished its own world record as the field of teams increased from 114 teams the year prior to an astonishing 169 teams. Registration was cut off weeks in advance of the event as tournament officials scrambled to accommodate the explosive growth.
The wiffle ball part of this event is really marvelous. 291 games last year. Teams fighting to get to Sunday. The talent that is on display on Sunday afternoon when the fields get whittled down.
But to be very clear, this event is about so much more than the wiffle ball games.
The 2022 event featured a live performance by The Players Club, a mechanical bull, dunk tank, freshly grilled food, kettle corn, Kona Ice, cotton candy and popcorn. Liberty Park has never seen more people on its grounds at one time. Thousands came just to spectate.
Just mentally prepare yourself for what looms this year because we're going to make the 2022 event seem more boring than a Hallmark movie.
So mark your calendars for Thursday, August 10th through Sunday, August 13th. To accommodate what we know will be increased demand we'll be building out additional fields and taking the event from four days to three.
Please go to the website for all information/rules/etc. on the event, but here's some general info ...
- Six different divisions (7-9, 10-12, 13-15, 16-29, 30+, female division).
- Players must be 7 years old by August 10th to participate.
- All teams get assigned two random pool play games on Thursday (6-9 PM)/Friday (6-9 PM)/Saturday (8 AM - 8 PM) and all teams that go 2-0 or 1-1 are seeded and advance to single elimination championship bracket play on Sunday.
- We can schedule teams pool play games around other obligations on Thursday/Friday/Saturday. Sunday, we're helpless as the bracket (starts at 8 AM) dictates all.
- Teams can have three or four players
Our sponsors last year - let's just say they got their money's worth. If you are a business owner that enjoys wild revenue spikes and dominating your competition, click here to see how you can get involved.
Rich Swerbinsky
richswerb@gmail.com
440-552-0691